2003-07-22

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Right now, I'm hoping to distract myself with the internet and this diary. I took my first dose of Paxil last night at 9:30, and I have been up ever since. I am having some scary side effects, like I have been very confused, didn't know if I was asleep or awake, I'm shaking uncontrollably, and I'm having bizarre thoughts or dreams. I'm really scared, so I put an emergency call in to the doctor. It's been thirty minutes so far, and she hasn't answered the page. Hopefully sonn, so she can tell me if there is anything I can do for it right now. If I could just sleep it off, then that would be good. It was such a tiny dosage. I'm supposed to be waking up for work in about an hour or so, and I don't know what I'm going to do about that. I've missed quite a bit of work as it is. I was just off last wednesday.

I just need to take care of myself right now. I'm trying to keep positive, even though I'm very frightened right now. I keep reminding myself that it's just nasty side effects, I don't have to take the medicine again, and that it will eventually wear off. I just hope she calls soon to give me a little insight.

Please send good vibes my way, if you can. Thanks.